Saturday, April 23, 2011

"I'm going to quit smoking.", he said.

"I"ll quit , too. We'll be quitters together.", I said.

"Like, next week, I'm done. I haven't decided which day, though. But sometime next week, I'm done with cigarettes."

"I will totally do it with you. It's easier when you have a buddy to go through stuff with you. The gym, quitting smoking, whatever. Always easier with a buddy.", I assured him.

Well, I guess I will be quitting in the morning. I have one delicious Marlboro Menthol Ultra Light left. I have enough money (in quarters, mind you) to get my delicious 24-ounce cup o' sugary goodness in the morning (or early afternoon, you know... whenever the hell I wake up). I will most likely make enough tomorrow night to buy some more cigs on the way home from work, but will I have the willpower to just get the Yoo-Hoo, and skip the glorious post-work nicotine fix? I think I'll cave and get one last pack.

I can quit. I've done it before. I will do it again. It's just a habit, albeit a gross one. It takes 21 days to learn or unlearn a habit. I need three weeks to retrain myself to not reach for the cigs. But I also need the ritual of saying goodbye, and admitting that I'm buying this last pack. I wasn't prepared for the goodbye with this pack. But, I will make the next pack the last pack. I know, I know... I should just quit. I should just make that last cigarette tomorrow morning be greatness and be done with it.

But I want to do it in my own way. Because that's how I roll. My way or the highway.