a post I am calling ~Random Thoughts From My Alcohol-Addled Brain~ Yesterday's edition.

Yes, shots sound like an excellent idea tonight.

Tuaca does taste delicious.

Yay, Stephie's doing shots, too!

Aaron drives an automatic, convertible Mustang? What a girl's car!

More shots!!

Walking three blocks sounds totally feasible right now. Especially since we're going to another bar.

Wait, how many shots have we done so far?

Fajita beef nachos in a bar do NOT sound like a good idea. I'll pass.

Another another bar would be great. Let's roll!

But let's drive this time. Vickery Park is too far to walk.

Hey, they know my name here now. That cannot be good.

More Amstel Lights! And more Tuaca! I have lost count.

Oh man, I am hungry. I should've eaten those beef nachos.

Stephie is leaving. If I were smart, I would leave too. Fuck it, let's get another beer.

Yay, Christa and Noel are here now! And at midnight, it's Christa's birthday. DRINKS!

Yay, Jacob and Juliette are here! MORE DRINKS!

Jacob, I really shouldn't do anymore shots. I see that you got one for me, and I appreciate it. But this is red. I have been drinking Tuaca. I don't think this is going to end well.

*five-second pause*

DOWN THE HATCH!

Yes, I think I would like to arm wrestle you!

I can totally do bakasana right now! Wait, let me take off my overshirt.

It's a bar, what do you mean 'I am being loud'? I am not even that loud!

It's a bar, what do you mean 'I need to sit down'? I am sitting down. Sort of. Shut up!

Fucking hell! I need to pull the plug on this as soon as possible. We've been at this since afternoon, and it's well past 1:30 in the morning now.

My iPod is fucked up! Everything is fucked up!

I want to lie in bed, like right now.

*commence 1.5 hours of dreamless, fitful sleep*

Oh my god, is this room spinning?

My mouth is watering. Holy shit, I am about to be sick.

I would give every penny in my bank account right now to NOT get sick.

*gets sick*

*cries*

*goes back to sleep for an hour*

Oh my god, this room is spinning again!

And my abs hurt. And my throat. Motherfucker! I know what's going on.

*goes to lie on bathroom floor*

I am glad I washed this rug.

The cool tile is my best friend.

I cannot be sick again, there's no food in my system, only booze!

If I let myself be sick right now, I can go back to sleep.

Motherfucking Jacob and that motherfucking red shot!

*gets sick again*

*cries again*

*goes back to sleep, this time in the living room, because it's four steps closer to the bathroom*

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand SCENE!

big props to Smang, for keeping the stupid-sugary "fitness water" in the house, and to the kids at White Rock Coffee for the bonus shot of espresso. You're all awesome. And when I feel better, I am going to personally thank each and every one of you.

All this debauchery just because the Hot Bartender turned out to be a Twat Bartender.