Once again, I'm in turmoil. I have a huge change coming. I would tell you all about it, but all the pertinent parties don't yet know what's going on. I have talked to most of my friends, and some of my loved ones. My story of awesome today is about my mom. I called her, and quickly told her all the details of what decision I was mulling over. She got quiet for a second, and then said, "Honey, at your age, you have to put you first. At your age, you're not interested in men anymore, you need to focus on you. At your age, no one is going to take care of you, you have to take care of yourself."
At my age? AT MY AGE?!?! First of all, I am not even the oldest of that lady's children and secondly, WTF? Am I some sort of old, decrepit spinster? Should I start planning to get a bunch of cats? I've already developed some sort of weird penchant for wearing scarves. I guess now I just have start mumbling about crazy kids, marching on my lawn, and where are my Werther's Originals?
If I am going to be a crazy cat lady, I am going to start with a Sphinx. I will call him Harold, and we will sit around judging things and hating everyone.